KelCor Grows Up

I saw a post on Instagram that said something like, “If you could speak to yourself ten years ago, but you only have 60 seconds, what would you say?”

Because I am terrible at remembering any kind of date, I opened my photo app and went to August 2016. What was I doing ten years ago?

Turns out August 22, 2016 was my first day of graduate school! Whew, glad I didn’t know how hard THAT was going to be. I would have crawled under my desk at school and refused to come out.

Life wasn’t perfect for me back then, but it was pretty ok! I was living in my parents’ basement, saving up for a house. It was my third year teaching high school English and I still loved it, mostly. I had fun going on road trips with friends and hiking in the mountains with Milo. I dated, went to concerts, tried to hit the gym a few days a week. Not bad at all.

If I could speak to that Kelly, the one who still has so much energy and health and hope, what would I say? Would I tell her what is coming? The freight train of shit that is about to run her over, back up, and run her over again? I dunno.

Actually, now that I read that again, of course I wouldn’t tell her anything about what’s coming. Why would I? Why terrify her when there is nothing she can do about it?

Instead, I’m thinking about what I needed to hear back then, the reassurance I was dying to hear:

You are doing a GREAT job. I’m so proud of you.

I know you feel insecure and like you don’t measure up. Guess what – everyone feels like that. You aren’t unique!

Lean on your family and don’t feel bad about it. They want to help.

You can handle anything and everything that comes. No, I mean it. You really can.

It’s going to be difficult, but you are well equipped with the support of incredible friends, family, coworkers, neighbors, and God.

You. Will. Not. Fail.

I love you so much, and I’m so impressed with everything you’ve already learned.